Barack Obama Inaugurated as President; Rulzes Millions

January 20, 2009...Barack Obama has pwned his way into the White House, and has rulzd millions of losers standing in his way. Truly, an historic event.

By the way, you'll have heard the phrase 'an historic event' thrown around a lot this season, and you should be clear when repeating this at social gatherings, or around the office...the article 'an' should only be used in this case if you emphasize the 'stor' in 'historic'...otherwise, you're kinda being a douche. Also 'historic' and 'historical' are not used interchangeably; the former refers to a specific event, the latter may be one in a series. Trust me, one's friends hold them to higher grammatical standards than one might think.

That's why a Mr. Obama's speech was polished and polite...an intrepid, yet confident anthem to foray into the future. Did anyone else notice a pained, almost Bill Clinton-esque quality to his voice? Much like the way Eli speaks (in 'There Will Be Blood') to convey fear and instill a grave sense of pious responsibility in his congregation? Man, how much of a joke was Paul Dano in that film!

Of course, Mr. Obama could not have rocked his way into the White House without the active support of America's young democrats, eager souls who approach politics with fervor and enthusiasm, and I am proud to call many of these dedicated advocates my friends.

But, I'm proudest to say that the most energetic of them--those who attended the Obama inauguration--definitely rulzd everyone else there.